Joined: Jan 12, 2007
Location: Denver, CO
|
Here is a step by step procedure to be followed to ensure bliss during the winter storms in Colorado... 1) buy some tools. 2) buy one freaking expensive torque wrench 3) Have 3 blizzards in quick succession. 4) wait 4 months for the snow to melt 5) have another blizzard for good measure 6) order the special oil filter and cup spanner from BMW store over the internet, 7) Return the incorrect oil filter and spanner they sent you, wait for proper ones to arrive 8) ride the bike over Girlfriend’s place (she has a nice clean garage) 9) put down an old blanket in the garage to lie down on as illustrated:  10) start removing the fairing in search of the oil drain plug. 11) give up search for plug, but discover toasted birdie wedged between fairing and cylinder head:  12) Remove crispy birdie bits and completely gross out Girlfriend….  13) Discover that the BMW engineers are smarter than me, and that you actually don’t need to remove the fairing to drain the oil.  14) Get Girlfriend to hold a plastic bottle ready to catch the oil as you unscrew the plug. 15) Make sure she gets nice gooey oil all over her hands, and at least ½ the oil falls on the garage floor. 16) at this point, have the neighbor come over on his Ducati 996 and give you a free beer. (he owns a Learjet rental company – lucky bastard) 17) Pretend to loooove beer, make chit chat while bike drips more oil on floor. 18) change filter, put back plug, pour in fresh oil. 19) pour in more oil. 20) After 5th quart, ask yourself “where the f### is all this oil going?” 21) It now being dark outside, give up and return following morning to properly view the sight glass in daylight 22) Discover that you have over-filled the oil. Go back to step 14 and repeat. 23) unscrew drain plug, stick your thumb up the drain hole to control the deluge while keeping an eye on the sight glass, all while contorted on your back under the bike – Yoga would be helpful here. 24) put everything back in it’s place 25) Please explain to Girlfriend why the garage now has funny odor, and dark stains on the floor: 
26) say a prayer, start the engine, and say YIPPEE when it starts and does not blow up. 27)ride to florist to buy flowers to restore relationship with significant other. piece of cake 
Posted on
04/05/2007 at 15:49
|
Joined: Nov 17, 2006
Location: Raleigh, NC
|
Hey that's pretty funny. I must be doing something wrong, mine was easy! I just removed my wheels and had new tires mounted. I suggest you not attempt that! For the oil stains, pour on some paint thinner and scrub with a stiff brush. Then wipe up with an old towel. Do it again, leave a puddle of paint thinner this time, and cover over night with cat litter (the clay kind). Most, if not all, of the stain will be gone the next day. Now, don't smoke when doing this! Robo
Posted on
04/05/2007 at 16:01
|
Joined: Jan 12, 2007
Location: Denver, CO
|
Excellent tip!!!  Thanks!!!
Posted on
04/05/2007 at 16:15
|
Joined: Nov 12, 2006
Location: janesville, WI
|
 Roborider said: Hey that's pretty funny. I must be doing something wrong, mine was easy! I just removed my wheels and had new tires mounted. I suggest you not attempt that! For the oil stains, pour on some paint thinner and scrub with a stiff brush. Then wipe up with an old towel. Do it again, leave a puddle of paint thinner this time, and cover over night with cat litter (the clay kind). Most, if not all, of the stain will be gone the next day. Now, don't smoke when doing this! Robo Man, I thought the 1st set of instructions were scary, but I didn't know I had to remove my tires and wheels to change the oil??? I had a bird get stuck once and man it sure stunk for about a 1/2 hour.
Posted on
04/05/2007 at 18:39
|
Joined: Apr 03, 2007
Location: Lapeer, MI
|
Oil on the floor (small spots) can also be fairly effectively cleaned off with brake parts spray cleaner. It's cheap and effective. Use caution as it is also flammable. Gotta Love those P.M. Ditties. My last oil change cost $2500. I shouldn't admit stoopid, but after 30 years of maintenence I got careless. Started the RT for a warmup to do the oil this February and let it run for 5 or 8 minutes- it didn't take long at the balmy 28 degrees. The computer richened mix and lack of moving air (I know better) melted everything near the pipes. Yeah, stupid is supposed to hurt. Thankful it was only plastic and paint and not the garage.
---------------------------------
I will not make motorcycle sounds at work... I will not make motorcycle sounds at work...
Posted on
04/08/2007 at 21:14
|
Joined: Mar 19, 2007
Location: Vail, CO
|
Funny dude. Very well put. Scott
Posted on
04/11/2007 at 16:05
|
Joined: Jan 16, 2007
Location: Apex, NC
|
Ok, I can get past the searching for oil plug, dripping oil on the floor and overfilling, but "pretend to love beer"??? Dude, strike three, you're out!!! 
Posted on
04/11/2007 at 16:32
|
|
Joined: Mar 19, 2007
Location: Vail, CO
|
Rickyj said:Ok, I can get past the searching for oil plug, dripping oil on the floor and overfilling, but "pretend to love beer"??? Dude, strike three, you're out!!! Not even for one minute did I figure that comment has any remote possibility of being serious. If it was, well, I'm speechless. Or hey, more power to you I guess; that leaves more beer for the rest of us. Scott
Posted on
04/11/2007 at 17:17
|
Joined: Mar 04, 2007
Location: Paragould, AR
|
 OMG...only 1 beer! How did you manage? The manual calls for at least 3!!
Nice write up.....on a practical note, what was your mileage when you did this "professional" oil change?
---------------------------------
Chris D.-Paragould, AR USA
Rider, roamer - adventurer - wanderer - vagabond - traveler - rover - explorer -rambler - drifter - voyager - nomad
Posted on
04/12/2007 at 09:27
|
Joined: Jan 12, 2007
Location: Denver, CO
|
I am a sucker for keeping to the BMW manual, so I change my oil every 3000 miles. Probably overkill, but I like the piece of mind. Especially when the dealer charges something like $300 to do it. Now that I have performed this once, it will really be a 10 minute job next time round, (depending on the absence of beer, the size of the grilled bird, and the willingness of the girlfriend to help out again 
Posted on
04/12/2007 at 14:59
|
Joined: Feb 01, 2007
Location: Punta Gorda, FL
|
I've got to admit that changing oil on the R1200RT is much easier (and much cleaner) than many of my older bikes for sure. On that expensive filter wrench thing? Well, rummaging around the tool box produces a $3.00 filter strap wrench that works just fine. If my wife is feeling guilty for Christmas, she may buy me an "official" oil filter tool, but for now, the strap wrench works just fine. Thanks for the quick read on how to change the oil. Some parts of that are parts of my history for sure!! AD
Posted on
04/14/2007 at 18:27
|
|
Joined: Mar 19, 2007
Location: Vail, CO
|
Antonyrelou said: I am a sucker for keeping to the BMW manual, so I change my oil every 3000 miles. Where does your manual say every 3,000 miles? Mine says "contact your dealer" and specifically shows maintenance (at varying levels of work/involvement) at 6,000 mile intervals.
Posted on
04/15/2007 at 21:55
|
Joined: Dec 27, 2006
Location: Knoxville, TN
|
My manual also says every 6,000 miles. But I change it every 3,000. Non-synthetic oil in these boxers can breakdown quicker, so I just do it. Probably just a hold over from my older days.
---------------------------------
If you're not leanin', you're learning
Posted on
04/16/2007 at 00:42
|
|
Joined: Jan 16, 2007
Location: Apex, NC
|
Yeah I believe every 6k miles is the manufactures recommendation but the way it leaks oil I figure I'm putting in a pretty steady stream of new oil anyway
Posted on
04/16/2007 at 17:44
|
Joined: Jan 21, 2007
Location: Katy, TX
|
Smokyrt said: My manual also says every 6,000 miles. But I change it every 3,000. Non-synthetic oil in these boxers can breakdown quicker, so I just do it. Probably just a hold over from my older days. WASTE! Quality dino oil in your boxer will easily go 6000 miles unless you are riding in the city during the heat of summer and your oil temp gauge routinely runs 8 bars. Quit over consumming our planet's oil resources. Oil change intervals of 6000 miles are plenty frequent. In your older days, oil was not what it is today. Changing oil at 3000 miles is like changing tires every week....wasteful. And spilling a quart of it the garage floor is negatively impacting the environment. Knock it off!
---------------------------------
Dennis
Posted on
04/26/2007 at 22:20
|
